Tea Bag

A woman is like a tea bag. You never know how strong she is until she's in hot water.

AND I AM SO GLAD TO BE OUT OF THAT TEA CUP!!

It's only been in the last couple days, now that the dust has settled, that I realize how true that statement really is. I've actually had time to reflect on what transpired and how deeply it affected every aspect of my life. I never really realized how deeply it affected everyone. Especially my family, my friends and my love. But after that storm, came a rainbow wrapped in such clarity and peace.

I made the best of the holidays under the circumstances. But I really would like a "do-over". I never sent out my annual family picture christmas cards nor wrote my New Year's Letter for the blog.

But now that I have that monkey or should I say gorilla off my back, I can function again. So here's my attempt at my late New Year's letter:

Welcome 2011! I just love the sound of that! A fresh, clean slate to chalk up new memories and I have some big ones on the way this year. Beginning with college auditions for Chelsea in the Spring and her high school graduation in June, closely followed by Carly's wedding in July. Two, supercool events, that require a box of kleenex and waterproof mascara at each!

And speaking of super, all I want are some super powers for 2011.

Perhaps the power to match a lid to its travel mug. They say every pot has its lid, but not when it comes to my travel mugs. I have about 300 plastic lids in my cupboard, but none fit my pink mug. I can't find the right lid, ever.....and no that is not a metaphor for my love life either!

I would like the power to remember directions that someone gives me, ten minutes after I have pulled over and asked for them. But unfortunately, I forget them right after I drive away. I can remember all the the lyrics, to "American Pie" ....bye bye, miss american pie, drove my chevy to the levy, but the levy was dry and good ole boys were drinking whisky and rye.......(now just try and get that song out of your head the rest of today).....but I can't remember directions moments after some one tells them to me.

The power to eat anything and not gain weight.

The power to find my keys and cell phone at will. In fact, if my cell phone could call my car keys, that would be awesome.

The power not to wince and scream during motocross when the riders fall down. (if only I could scream internally, that would be better)

The power to drive myself to the gym, but then that goes back to the power of finding the car keys.

The power to stay awake when watching TV in bed. Just can't stay awake as late as I used to.

The power to remember where I parked the car and not looking like an idiot while walking circles in the parking lot lugging groceries cause I can't find the damn car.

The power to remember someone's name when you run into them after you haven't seen them in a long time.

The power to return the DVD rental before the late charges reach $27.00.

And most importantly, the power to stay off the cell phone while driving. Cha Ching, $169.00 later.

Not asking for much, am I?

Well Happy New Year to all, let's make this the best one yet. That's what me and my teabags are planning to do.......

From dresses to monologues..........

In between my job search, I am surrounded by two stressed-out daughters. One has a wedding, just shy of 6 months away, while the other is memorizing 4 monologues for her Julliard audition. I'm not sure which one is more stressed out! Luckily, Carly found her wedding dress and I have to say it was like watching Cinderella try on that silver slipper. The minute she turned around after we zipped her up, we knew. And yes, my throat did get lumpy. In that moment, when she flashed that, "oh mom, this is the dress" smile, I saw my little girl in that woman and my throat tightened and my eyes filled. What a moment to share together, that one was a keeper. This is my first child to walk down the aisle, my first born. Pass the kleenex. On the other hand, we have the baby girl studying four plays so that she can perform four monologues in San Francisco in 2 weeks. She also has finals this week, is rehearsing every day (she got the lead in "You Can't Take It With You") and working on her vocals for her PCPA audition next weekend. Both have had meltdowns. I'd like to have one myself but, but there is just not time between interviews, wedding plans and monologues. So instead, I do what most people would do.....I go to DISNEYLAND......with my BFF peep Wendy. I even went on Space Mountain where I swear my teeth have realigned themeselves after that ride. Had a great time, yummy lunch, and good laughs. Just what I needed, to check out for the day and leave my worries at the front gate. Now back to reality and my world.

Onward!!!

New Year, New Possibilities

Would you believe I have joined the other trillion people out there looking for a new job?
.
Cuz, I just love a challenge : )

Yep, I have. I unleashed my resume to the universe last Friday.

Received a call on Monday.

Interview on Wednesday.

This could be cool, really cool.

Stand by.

Just click your heels....

There's no place like home, there's no place like home.......and finally I feel like I'm home. Home in my own home.

I can finally breathe. No more attorneys, no more court rooms, no more subpoenas.

I'm freeeeeeeeeeeee. And finally, I feel peace. Peace like I haven't felt in months. And I didn't have to look further than my own back yard. I feel like the weight of that house laying on the witch has been lifted off of me.

And now I can see a rainbow within my reach....

The perfect gift

One of my favorite Christmas gifts from my sista Gina.

I've been laughing out loud reading this.

I could swear this woman wrote this book

about me and my yorkie.

Thanks for the giggles, Bean.

Here come da judge.....

After 4 months of hell, we came, we saw, we kicked some ass. Attending with me today were, my boy toy troy, my Sheriff John, my Daddy & Sista and my BFF peeps, Patti and Wendy & John boy.

Inside the pocket of my blazer was one white feather, sent by my mum. In the other pocket, was Sheriff John, my new voodoo friend who eliminates bullies.

After hours of my truthful testimony, and then.....some not so truthful testimony, followed by the attorney's closing arguments, Judge Staffell concluded that my support will stand as is and then adjusts accordingly when Chel graduates in June.

(now picture the happy dance thru the courtroom and a hug for my attorney)

Plus, I was awarded my attorney's fees as well.
Today was a good day.
Justice was served on a large shiney, silver platter.








To all of you who stood by me during this difficult time, I thank you.

Your support, kindness and charity mean more than you will ever know.

Thanking you from the bottom of my heart.

Now if you will excuse me, I need to pack for my long and overdue trip to a land called exhaustion for some much needed R& R,

who knows maybe I'll be in a town near you!

Love you all. XOXO

By the time

you read this, it will be over.

The wait that is.
The last four months of my life have been pure hell and I have been unable to share that with you.

Tomorrow, a judge will decide and the bullying will end.

I will know my fate and be able to move forward........finally.

Stand by.......for the verdict.

Traditions

It's Christmas Eve. It's quiet. It's just me in the house snuggled in my bed with my coffee. It's cold and grey outside and the only sound I can hear is my clock chiming downstairs. Love moments like this. Time to reflect. Memories of Christmas Eve's past fill me. They were magical to me as a child and when I close my eyes right now, I am taken right back, right back to that Christmas Eve tradition, over 40 years ago, with my family. My three sisters and I would get all dressed up (sometimes in matching outfits) and load into the family station wagon, and head to the Lost Alaskan chinese restaurant. As we seldom ate out, this was a HUGE treat for us and very special. I can vividly remember that wonderful aroma as we walked thru the door of the restaurant and found our booth. Ahhhh, the fried rice and egg drop soup..divine...all of us sitting like little ladies at the table. After our bellies were full and the fortunes were read, we piled back in the car and off into the Arizona night to find the prettiest Christmas lights around. Dad would take us to the "fancy" neighborhoods so that we could "ooh and aw" at those twinkling, colorful lights. Oh the squeals of delight......as each neighborhood got better and better. We also kept one eye in the sky for Santa and his sleigh, too and Rudolf's red nose. We would then return home and were allowed to open just one present. This would usually be our Christmas jammies which we donned immediately. It was then off to bed to try to sleep. Trying to sleep was impossible. Filled with so much excitement and longing for morning to come. And the final tradition of the night was the stocking. Santa would enter our room, when "she" thought we were asleep and lay it on the food of our bed. On a few occassions, I was still awake, pretending to be asleep and watch my mom's sillouette quietly creep out of my room. That is a keepsake moment for me :) It was then that I would take one leg, with my toe extended and find that stocking and quietely, ever so quietly drag it up to me and hide it under my covers. In the darkness I would put my hand into that stocking, listening to the crinkling of its contents and try to figure out what delights were in it. Ahhh, the chocolate Santa which I would unwrap and devour as quietly as possible under the covers. No wonder I could not sleep! And there I would lay surrounded by the stockings contents, unable to see what they were, but laying among them as I drifted happily off to sleep..........

To this day, I continue this tradition with my children.

May you and yours have a magical Christmas.

Hugz

So many of you have touched me deeply recently.

Such kindness.

Such support.

Such charity.

You know who you are.

and i thank you

East or West?

Purging

Spent 3 hours in the garage last night, purging, purging, purging. Twenty years of stuff, and filled the trash can to the brim.

Good news tho, in just those three boxes, I found a

$40.00 gift certificate,

a $20.o0 gift certificate to Vons, and 3 uncashed personal checks. Yikes!

(that's what happens when you move in a hurry)

What other treasures will i find?

But I did find a "keepsake" photo I have been looking for : )

It's like a treasure hunt, you never know what you may find. Three down, 15 to go!!!

I'm Sad, I'm Mad, I'm Glad

Tough week, hell it's been a tough month.

Ain't gonna lie to you.

In fact I feel like "crap on a stick" right now.

So see there, things aren't always perfect at Tracy's Day.

Just thought you'd want to know.

Oh and that song you hear playing right now is my new anthem. Thanks, Cher.

Nite. Nite.


Tomorrow is a new day............

You Know?

I hate finishing a book.

Especially a good book.

Because as soon as it is finished, I miss the characters and I miss being a part of their lives and knowing what's happening. I miss the story and I miss reading it.

Maybe that's why I write this blog.
The story just keeps going on...................

Chelsea Chaput singing "Maybe this Time"

College Bound

Chelsea has been feverishly filling out college applications and writing essays. She spent many, many hours on one particular one. And it paid off. She has been invited to audition for one of the schools she applied for. Maybe you've heard of it......a little school called.....JUILLIARD in New York City!!!!

She will audition in San Francisco next February. It's almost surreal. From her first play in kindergartden to possibly Juilliard...oh my.

My Quote of the Week

"If the jackhammer doesn't work, I am going to rent a flame thrower. A big one."

Something.....

that I never, ever, ever thought would happen - DID.

I could be referring to something good or something bad, right?

And as my luck would have it, I was given one of each -

The good one is - Delightful.

While the bad one is - Despicable.

Never, say never.

Not in my wildest dreams.

It's December 1st!

Love, Love, Love this time of year!

But I'm still counting my blessings from Thanksgiving!

I'm thankful that my Daddy comes home tomorrow after a 2 week stay in the hospital!

I'm thankful that Chelsea is all in one piece after tripping over the Yorkie on the stairs and tumbling half way down all the while holding on to her cat. I so wish I had a video of that one!

I am thankful that my children are happy and healthy and that they now cook their Mom thanksgiving dinner!

I am thankful for my guy and his kindness.

I'm so thankful that I am surrounded with such incredible friends, especially during these last few months. Between the ICU and the court room, it has not been easy. But there is blue on the horizon. 2011 will bring a new beginning......an exciting one filled with changes.

Now if you will excuse me, I'm gonna whip up some hot chocolate, curl up on my couch in front of the fire and think about all the good things yet to come.....

Point Taken

Ok Blogland,

You got me. Your comments really got me. I have been amiss about blogging and you both know why. But you are so right, dang right.

Thank you for letting me share your comments -

"Now that's what I'm talking about!!!! What a wonderful way to start my day. I look so forward to your blogs and have missed them so much! Your blog is the first thing I go to before I even check my emails. DO NOT LET ANYONE or anything ever take your beautiful or creative writing ability away from your mind and spirit AGAIN because if you do they WIN and I will have to kick your ASS and sit on you and you know that will HURT!!!! luv ya. xoxo P.

And Stacy, thanks for your heartwarming comment.....I'd print it, but I can't find it right now :(
Love to all.

Simple Things

The best things in life are not things at all.

And for me, it really is all about the simple things.

Like yesterday, when I came home from visiting my Dad at the Rehab and found that you fixed my

"white picket fence".

Those are the "things" that make me smile from the inside out.