The !!%$$#$%# Quiche Caper

OK, today was not my day! I can only use one eye as the other has an infection in it. So, I can only wear ONE contact, the one for distance.....so I can see things miles away, but absolutely nothing up close. Eye MD says its time for lasek, sure dude, are you paying? Anyway, it's my day to cook dinner for Bruce, (my boss who is undergoing yucky chemo right now). Anyone that knows me, knows how much I love to cook, I'm serious, I really do until TODAY. I asked Bruce what he wanted........Quiche Lorraine...........no sweat, that's easy. So I whip up the quiche and set it in the preheated oven, and then it happened. Not thinking, I shoved the oven rack into place and the quiche overflowed and slopped everywhere. All over the bottom, sides and racks of the oven. I gasp! and then before thinking again, I grab the quiche to remove it only to have the FLIMSY aluminum pie tin fold in half and spill the remaining liquid of the quiche all over the oven window door. Now, I scream..................NO NO NO NO NO! So now there is quiche cooking or should I say burning on the bottom of the oven and smoke billowing out, so I grab some paper towels. I get on my knees, stick my head in the 425 degree oven only to recoil as I feel my remaining contact lens nearly melt on my one remaining eyeball. OMG, I am now blind. Smoke fills the house, Smoke alarm is screaming, and my dog is barking like a chihuahua on steriods. I just stand in the middle of the kitchen screaming the F bomb. I am blindly waving pillows at smoke alarm so it will stop SHREIKING, my dog won't stop barking because I am sure the smoke alarm has peeled the skin from his ear drums and the smoke is quickly filling the whole house. I felt like a one armed wall paper hanger. I am certain the Fire Dept. will be here any minute, as they are right next door to my little neighborhood. And hey, where is the hunky fireman that lives across the street when you need him? For 15 more agonzing minutes, that dang smoke alarm rang. I removed my shriveled contact and just sat on the floor and cried, but then started to laugh and then couldn't stop laughing. That deep in your belly laugh, that we all need! I am now completely sightless, my house smells like a campfire, and I have no quiche for my boss!! Could this day get any better? Anyway, I had enough ingredients and an extra pie shell, so onto quiche number 2. This time I didn't almost set the house on fire and "voila" a new quiche was made!